she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
