You work out of a Hotel?
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
