Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
