There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
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