god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
it's not cheating when I paid for it
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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