Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
