My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Randomize
