the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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