no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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