I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
