For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
Randomize
