i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
