I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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