it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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