Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
