My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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