HIV tests are more positive than that guy
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
