god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize