Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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