I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
