This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
