and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
