Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Text me some of your sweat
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
