Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
