how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
