guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
