did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
Randomize
