I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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