i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Randomize
