I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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