I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Randomize