dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Randomize
