Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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