you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
