There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
