Having a random hookup so left but love u
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
