Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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