The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
