imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
then he tried to convert me to islam
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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