you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
Acid is not a monday night drug
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
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