Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize