I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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