are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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