im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Randomize
