none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
