Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
