he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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