I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Randomize
