Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
