Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
