You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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