just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I understand Curling. That high.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Randomize
